A Mad Man in Love
by x-MewHazard-x
Summary: The ramblings of a mad man in love with his very human assistant. This is a Clyrnin fanfiction. Just Myrnin's thoughts on the matter of his affection towards Claire.


**Ramblings of a Mad Man in Love**

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MYRNIN

I don't quite know when it happened or how I even let it happen, in all honesty, but it became more and more apparent that I had begun developing feelings for the fragile human who was my apprentice. This revelation of sorts was not only dangerous for her but it was also dangerous for me too. If I were to lose control as I had done oh so many times before, I would suffer heartache all over again.

I believe I could survive it - I had to, Amelie and the town depended on me - but it would cause the pain in my chest to gain an even heavier weight. I would miss her dearly.

I recall telling her once that I did not find her physical appearance attractive yet her mind was a magnificent treasure to behold, but I later came to find her quite beautiful the more time I spent with her. As I watched her grow up a little - not just in age but confidence and intellect - she seemed to take shape as the wondrous woman she is now. Over the few years the girl has become the brilliant, brave, quick-witted assistant of that mad reckless scientist. Some fear her because she works with vampires, some admire her for the same reason, most fear _for_ her but everyone has a certain degree of respect for the girl. With everything she has been through, there is no doubt she deserves it.

Claire Danvers. What a wondrous creature she is, seemingly not of this world - and coming from a vampire, that's saying something.

I quite enjoyed the sight of her strolling in to the lab as if she wasn't working with the most dangerous thing within a thirty-mile radius and just hopping up on to the nearest stool, pulling out a book and resting her chin in her hand as she began reading. I quite liked the way she would sometimes bring treats and coffee with her as a nice surprise like we were friends - I liked how she referred to us as friends rather than work colleagues. The way she held her hair back as she looked at any microscope samples. Even the way her eyelids fluttered when she was sleep-deprived and refusing to give in, to the point I had to send her home because she was literally falling asleep at the lab bench using her open book as a pillow.

I thought my fondness stretched only as a far as a caring boss, as I was, then maybe a friend, as she liked to suggest, but it seemed that now my fondness went much farther than that. I would have honestly liked to further our relationship...but there was an obstacle in the shape of a clueless, hefty lump blocking that stepping stone. The troublesome hindrance went by the name of Shane Collins and it just so happened that his father's brain powered the systems in place of my dear Ava after she passed for good.

Having Frank work in place of Ava was...convenient but not preferable. He often got in the way of an advances however subtle they were. Even popping up when I was merely admiring her from across the room while she sat unaware working or reading. The bothersome computerised image would simply appear out of nowhere and just give me a pointless report of how everything was as it was supposed to be and that nothing had changed. I knew he wasn't just informing me of the town's safety, he was interfering in our time together and subtly letting me know he was watching. It was more irritating than intimidating.

The boy however was more than a little annoying as he was the one she was going back to every evening when she left. She would be with me for all but a few hours but then back home she would always go to that daft, unworthy child. He didn't know how lucky he was to have such a gem as Claire. He couldn't conceive how brilliant her mind was let alone view her beauty in all its detail as I with my more-than-perfect vision.

He didn't trust me - and nor did I - but Claire did and, although it was a mistake, I loved her for it. She had already proven that she was more than capable of defending herself and detaining me while I have not been myself at times. But it only takes one wrong move in one split second. The fact that Collins didn't trust me proved that there was a brain in that head of his but that was all - it only proved he had one, not that he used it.

However dense the boy was Claire loved him and he was the lucky fool who currently held her heart. It was a fact that caused a little tear in my own. But I had lived a many hundred years and I knew of how fickle humans could be. Though it was not becoming of one to long for a moment of weakness, I hoped I could maybe swoop in and steal her at some point. But I would not dare move if I was not first certain that she would be interested and I had yet to learn the farthest that she had envisioned our relationship. It wasn't something that came up in conversation easily.

As of late, I found myself pondering on if and how I would convey my feelings. Should I just come out right and tell her? Or, as they say 'actions speak louder than words', should I increase proximity and see if she moves away or remains close? Or maybe that's not enough and I should just kiss her? What better way to convey all the emotion and feelings than through the intimate act of a kiss. But then would that be too far? Would she dislike it? It would complicate things, make her uncomfortable. No, I needed to be slow and careful. I needed to make sure that I paid attention to how she reacted to me to ensure that I did not displease her.

Even though I wanted to have Miss Danvers to myself, I wanted nothing more than her happiness so I felt some guilt with what I was about to do - yet not enough to stop me. My curiosity was all the motivation I needed.

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 **Little idea that I wanted to use to try and exercise my writing since I've had writer's block for quite a while now. It helped a little. Back to my other on-going story, I think ^_^**

 **MUCH LOVE TO YOU ALL FOR READING!**

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 **Gotta improve, people, onwards and upwards!**

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 **Lv Lv Hazzard ^_^ x x**


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